I have finished childproofing my home but I didn't do a good job.
My kids are still able to get in the house.
It felt so good to quit my DJ job in mid-shift while talking live to the listeners...
Fun fact: Julius Caesar never told his men "Good job".
This is likely because he couldn't speak English.
What is a good job for a fish that has perfect pitch?
Guitar tuna
Sorry, this is really bad even by dad joke standards.
Why is picking vegetables a good job?
It comes with a great celery
In my job interview I was asked what some of my good qualities were...
Well my doctor always calls me patient.
A guy’s Mom comes to visit him at his job at the aquarium where she finds him feeding a baby dolphin. She says look at you, you were smart. You could have had a real job, really done some good for the world. Her son snapped back,...
Hey, my job serves a youthful porpoise!
Why are scarecrows so good at their jobs?
They’re outstanding in their field
Good job coming dad. (3 year old son after he told me to come eat breakfast)
Me: Mommy tells me that all the time.
He has a near photographic memory, I'm hoping one day when he's twenty he coughs out his cold cereal in college as he gets the joke.
Her: "Nice job, these are good scones"
Me: "That's what I was scone for!"
Her: "Ugh." eyeroll
Why are Police Dogs so good at their jobs?
Because they’re always pursuing leads.
there once was a farmer, who wasn't just good at his job.
He was out standing in his field
I had a really good job at the park sweeping leaves,
A farmer isn’t just good at his job...
He’s out standing in his field.
Edit: Wow, my first ever silver! Thanks guys.
I'm here to make a serious complaint about my local subway. Generally they do a good job, but I today I did an online order (so I didnt SEE them make anything). I didnt unwrap it in the store to check (because who does that), but when I got home it was absolutely not what I ordered.
My Dad said it was always important to make a good impression at the start of a job interview...
So whenever I went for one I always entered the room saying “Nice to see you, to see you....”. Only once did someone respond.
A man is at a job interview and the interviewer asks him “So why do you think you’d make a good waiter” and the man replied “Well, I think I could bring a lot to the table”
My job is telling genuine trees apart from fake trees. I was so worried I'd be bad at it but as it happens I'm quite good.
When my ex wife and I divorced, I handed her a letter saying, “Good job. Well done.”
I wanted things to end on a positive note.
I once got a job offer to work at a tennis sporting goods store.
But it was just a racket. 😞
My ice machine was really cool, so I decided to encourage it... I said, "good job ice machine, you're crushing it."
Being a Train driver must be a good Job.
In this role you always will find yourself on track.
What did the Egg say to the Ant that was very good as its job?
Some puns here do a good job at pushing the envelope. Too bad they'll always be stationery.
I hired someone to iron my clothes. They did such a good job.
why was the seamstress so good at her job?
Good job we keep the glasses in the kitchen
What do auctioneers have to know to be good at their jobs?
What do you say to someone that's good at their job at the ice factory?
A scarecrow is not simply good at its' job.
It is outstanding in the field (on a (re-)post).
Train conductors are really good at their job
Because they’re training everyday!
Most people have a good paying job, priests on the other hand have a god praying job
I graduated from University with Honors, but even after all that effort I STILL can't find a good job
It's a distinction without a difference
My Red headed friend's job is delivering baked goods to stores.
He is the 'Ginger Breadman'!
What did the very unorthodox dairy factory manager say to his security manager named Shaun who was very good at his job?
"Nothing here gets past-your-eyes-eh-Shaun?"
Good Job Son!
Dad: How is school going?
Son: Bad. Today the teacher kicked me out of class and made me stand outside.
Dad: Good Job son! You're and outstanding student now.
Badum tsss...
Scarecrows are really good at their jobs.
Usually outstanding in their fields.
I had a job at a tennis goods factory
I got fired for making a racquet
Why is the scarecrow so good at his job
Because he’s outstanding in the his field
Why was the scarecrow so good at his job?
He’s out standing in his field
Why are scarecrows so good at their jobs?
Because they are always out standing in their field.
The farmer isn't just good at his job
He's out standing in his field
That farmer isn't just good at his job
He's out standing in his field.
I'm a farmer and I'm not just good at my job
I'm out standing in my field.
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