He’s got the spirit
πŸ‘︎ 146
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πŸ‘€︎ u/According-Ad8779
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2020
🚨︎ report
The trail blazer lost his Christmas spirit.
πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bev_err
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
🚨︎ report
My ex actually has 3 spirit animals:

Lion, Ass, Cheetah

πŸ‘︎ 82
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πŸ‘€︎ u/medimanager
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Want to contact the spirit of a dead Italian ?

Use a Luigi board.

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2020
🚨︎ report
He has good spirit though
πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Average-Fool
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2020
🚨︎ report
She fell in love with a spirit

She got ghosted

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Josentangles
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the encouraging girl spirit say to the other ambitious girl spirit?

β€œYou ghost girl!”

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2020
🚨︎ report
That's the spirit
πŸ‘︎ 155
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πŸ‘€︎ u/danieltan1502
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Why don't spirits wear shoes?

Because they're...

...sole-less!

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/weirdgroovynerd
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Why witches should not ask underground spirits for an advice?

Because they live under the rock.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ChillySunny
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2020
🚨︎ report
I heard people are blaming imaginary evil spirits for Micheal Jackson's death.

Guess they're blaming it on the boogie.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Aniketraghav7
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2020
🚨︎ report
Sitting in the ER with my son last night, he got me with this one. I was trying to lift his spirits and was pointing out all the crazy equipment they have in the room. I said "Oh look. They have tongue depressers." He says "Those won't work on me." I asked why and he says...

"I'm on antidepressants."

He's going in for surgery at 3:30pm Pacific. All your positive thoughts and prayers are appreciated.

Edit: Thank you all for the kind words and omg for the gold! He's out of surgery and looks to be recovering nicely. All your well wishes helped cheer him and his parents up.

πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thebikerdad
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2019
🚨︎ report
The immaculate conception? The Holy Spirit was in the womb where it happened.
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/innerstrife
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Where does a spirit of a cat live?

In the purrgatory.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/danielsoft1
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
🚨︎ report
I will hit the holy spirit into you if I have to.
πŸ‘︎ 38
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tj4y
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2019
🚨︎ report
Singer of Smells Like Teen Spirit
πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Darkathion890
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2020
🚨︎ report
In the spirit of sharing our kids attempts at dad jokes,

My daughter had to wire an essay about her hobby, which is softball. Her opener:

Pitcher this, you’re standing on a mound.

I was overwhelmed, and more proud than ever. She threw in some other puns too, it was an excellent essay, she’s giving me a run for my money, I batter watch out.

Edit: thank you u/PsychicGnome for the reminder that my kids are better parents than I am

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OnionShanty
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2020
🚨︎ report
You know what would really lift my spirits these days?

If I integrated a gym into my liquor store.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DoorHalfwayShut
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2020
🚨︎ report
After drinking mineral spirits...

I told the minerals to go home, they were drunk.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mindfullsilence
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a dwarven convict who can talk to spirits and escape prison?

A small medium at large.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Hufflestuff33
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Lifting your spirits
πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sketchb02
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Lifting spirits!
πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/blazinfastjohny
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call the spirits of honey bees?

Boo-bees

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2020
🚨︎ report
My brother took a test to see his animal spirit...

He couldn't bear the results

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bro-mine
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Getting into the holiday spirit with this Missile Toe I 3D Printed
πŸ‘︎ 641
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HumbertoL
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2017
🚨︎ report
My friend got attacked by a spirit

It got charged with a-soul-t

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/toban6273
πŸ“…︎ Feb 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Dont we all love the christmas spirit
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/an-original-URL
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2019
🚨︎ report
I'm trying to get into the Christmas Spirit

But I just can't seem to open the bottle

πŸ‘︎ 50
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Twigsnapper
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2019
🚨︎ report
The spirits have spoken... /r/AskOuija/comments/fdoq…
πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Satolah
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2020
🚨︎ report
A Jim Beam warehouse caught fire, destroying 40,000 barrels of bourbon. Warehouse workers were reported to be in "low spirits."

Seriously though, terrible loss.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/relativelyben
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2019
🚨︎ report
When drinking spirits, it’s important to be responsible.

Otherwise you’re decisions could come back to haunt you.

πŸ‘︎ 33
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LyricalWillow
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2019
🚨︎ report
I relate to this on a spirit level
πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Girthquakenz
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2019
🚨︎ report
What's Donald Trumps spirit animal?

A Wall-rus.

πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Pdonkey
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2018
🚨︎ report
My spirit animal is the crocodile

I live in denial.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ElZoof
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Do you guys know which album Smells Like Teen Spirit was on?

wait I got it, nevermind

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Hank_the_Hand
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2019
🚨︎ report
you shouldn't date spirits

they'll always ghost you

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PdawgUltimate
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Spirit Level, enough said.
πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/spinekar123
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2019
🚨︎ report
A ghost walks through a bar and orders the Christmas Spirit.

The bartender says, "Sorry, but Christmas passed."

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2019
🚨︎ report
In the spirit of the season, here’s a meme I made years ago.
πŸ‘︎ 26
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Otto-Erotic
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2018
🚨︎ report
πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2019
🚨︎ report
Hyenas hate Spirit airlines.

The are too cheap to pay for carrion luggage.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PdSales
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2019
🚨︎ report
When I told my friend about my intention to stop drinking, he said β€œthat’s the spirit!”
πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dubaidadjokes
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2019
🚨︎ report
My spirit animal
πŸ‘︎ 39
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rasamson
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2018
🚨︎ report
How do you summon an Italian Spirit?

With a Luigi Board.

πŸ‘︎ 83
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BlissedIgnorance
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2020
🚨︎ report

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