How do they milk oats?

So my family and I were watching TV and an ad for oat milk came up.

I asked out loud "how do they milk oats?"

My stepsister responded "they crush them until they cry"

I instinctively said "they do that with grapes too but they only wine"

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2020
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I can't seem to grow oats or barley, or spelt in the mountains where I live. I guess it's true what they say...

No plains no grains

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ahughman
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2020
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I tried introducing young people to 80s music especially hall and oats

I didn’t know i was that out of touch

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gnocky12
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2020
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A raisin, a peanut, and an oat sit down and order a drink.

The bartender says, β€œwhat do you think this is, a granola bar? β€œ.

πŸ‘︎ 72
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Twigsnapper
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2019
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What do you call an organic version of quaker oats?... earthquakes
πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/J4YV33lol
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2019
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How do they make oat milk?

They milk a goat and remove all of the G.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/p3t3r133
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2019
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My girlfriend and I were discussing dressing as Hall and Oats for next Halloween

Her: who would be Hall and who would be Oats?

Me: I better be Oats because you're gluten intolerant.

She actually laughed.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/torakwho
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2015
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You like Hall n' Oates?

Cool. Feed my horse.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zaxxonn26
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2020
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What’s a duck’s favorite breakfast food?

Quacker oats

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Josentangles
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2020
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Not specifically a joke but....

Today my wife was making oatmeal cookies, and was getting rolled oats out of the cupboard. I adamantly told her to STOP and she can't use them yet. Grabbing them, I proceeded to walk across the kitchen, and roll them across the floor. "There. NOW you have rolled oats," I say. Only to receive a facepalm and to be told to get out of the kitchen...

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/medaele
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2020
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What do you call a crappy Hall and Oates cover band?

Hollow Notes

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ingrahamlincoln
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2018
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TIL that Daryl Hall and John Oates started out as long-distance truckers

They were haulin' oats

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πŸ‘€︎ u/furrthur
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2017
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Me and a couple of friends are arguing how to get out of the grain silo.

We're all in the same oat.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dodsdans
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2020
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I found a typo on a bag of grains

It was spelt incorrectly.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SmokeRingHalo
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2020
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A local man shows up to his local Starbucks for his daily cup of coffee.

β€œGrande macchiato with oat milk, please.”

The cashier started to process his order, until the man asked β€œWhy are you wearing a surgical mask?”

β€œI’m not”, said the barista, β€œit’s a coughy filter”.

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πŸ“…︎ May 08 2020
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What do you call a semi driver rocking out to 80s music while carrying a load of grain?

Haulin’ Oats... πŸ€¦πŸ»β€β™‚οΈπŸ€¦πŸ»β€β™‚οΈπŸ€¦πŸ»β€β™‚οΈ I’ll show myself to the door. -dad

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bradb717
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2019
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I asked my wife what to feed to the horses this afternoon.

She told me, β€œHoney, lunches of oats.”

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/richrashjr
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2020
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One of my favorite bands from the 80’s
πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Space_tronaut
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2018
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A horse walks into a bar and grill...

The bartender says, "hey."

The horse says, "neigh. But I'll take some Quick Oats for the road."

The asphalt in the corner says, "thanks."

πŸ‘︎ 47
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2019
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A bunch of grains got together to protest.

It was a real rye-ot.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thelionmermaid
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2019
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Did you hear about the singing farmer who was big in the 80s?

He was Haulin' Oats.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LtSnakePlissken
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2019
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Got my 3 year old, but she didn't get it

We were playing "restaurant", and this was a special restaurant that only only animals went to.

In the middle of playing a family of goats came to the restaurant and they were ordering their food.

"Daddy, what's the baby goat going to eat?"

"The kid's meal"

I cracked myself up

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dzmagoon
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2015
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What do you call someone who likes anime and eats one type of cereal?

An oataku.

πŸ‘︎ 403
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2017
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I offered to make my girlfriend some oatmeal.

When she declined, I told her she was missing oat.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KeepingItKosher
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2018
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What is the Netherland’s favorite band?

Holland oats

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ“…︎ May 15 2019
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What do you call someone who really likes to talk about cereals?

A keen oat speaker

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/awfullyawful
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2018
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What do you call musically-inclined horse feed from the Netherlands?

Holland Oats.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DooDad-DontMother
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2018
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Have you heard about the 80's pop duo who are now working in cereal distribution?

They're haulin' oats.

πŸ‘︎ 103
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πŸ‘€︎ u/alaginge
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2017
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What do Alaskans eat for breakfast?

Quaker Oats

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ItsMRslash
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2018
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What was the grain truckers favorite band?

Haulin' oats.

πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ‘€︎ u/neutral_cadence
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2017
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Cheerio!

Well, got to go now, adiOATS

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cakepoprock
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2018
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Do you think Quaker calls their delivery fleet

Haulin' Oats?

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kuzinrob
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2017
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What does the music at a horse rave sound like?

Oats oats oats oats...

πŸ‘︎ 42
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ediciusNJ
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2015
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Why was the farmer in the mood for some 80's soft rock?

He was haulin' oats.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BootymeatJohnson
πŸ“…︎ Apr 13 2017
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I asked my wife if she wanted lozenges in her granola

She looked at me kind of grossed out and I told her: everyone loves Halls and Oats

πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nerd_of_gods
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2016
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Why did the farmer quit his job to pursue a music career?

He was tired of Hallin Oates.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mustachereviews
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2016
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Dad's response when asked why he was carrying around a huge box of cereal

"Well son, I'm haulin' oats!"

πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BunniesOfLove
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2013
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What do Dutch baby boomers eat for breakfast?

Holland oats

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VikingofRock
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2015
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My dad's repertoire

Here is a small selection of my dad's choice dadjokes.

Me - "Dad, hold on."

"I don't have an on to hold!"

Me - "Hey!"

Dad - "Oats!" or on occasion, in response to 'hey!' "...is for horses!"

Makes me roll my eyes so hard every time.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2013
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Regarding the Duggar family with a million kids...

Me: They may as well be puritans. Female Coworker: Aren't they Quakers? Aren't Quakers the horse people? Dad Coworker: No, they're the oats people.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/oh_hey_jc
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2014
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