My friend said mountain climbing would be fun

I’m inclined to agree

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Skryf
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
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My mountain-climbing trips are very well planned

I’m always on top of things

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πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2020
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Climbing a mountain is great

But it's all downhill from there

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Thromadon
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2020
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I asked my friend how he got into climbing mountains.

He said it is a natural inclination.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2019
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A mountain climber had recently set the world record for climbing a mountain with a strange name

He was at the peak of productivity

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tylermemelord
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2018
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I tripped and fell while mountain-climbing...

It was all down hill from there.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Riptide898
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2017
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Why couldn’t the peeping tom climb mountains?

Because he always peaked.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rabid_Badger_83
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2020
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Why did the comedians climb the mountain?

Cause they thought it would be hill-arious!!!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RSGaming0416
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2020
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Why did the Yorkshireman climb the mountain?

Because it was summit to do.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EmVee66
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2019
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Why did the junkies climb the mountain?

So that they could get high.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jetty_Boy
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2019
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Do the guys who climb mountains

ever rest?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/v_cleaner
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2015
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I finally cut ties with a friend who was dragging me down

Mountain climbing with a friend is very hard.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Russell_Pinto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2020
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Did you hear about the man who climbed mountains in north pole and south pole?

He was bi-polar.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pursuitofstumble
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2016
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Mountains must be hard to climb.

You can neverest.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/everabove
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2016
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I finally cut ties with a person that was holding me back

Mountain climbing with friends is hard.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/_joshi_
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
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For kind, and for country (sic)

I was on an overnight trip to climb a mountain recently with my friend. We were eating dinner by headlamp when my friend exclaimed, " fuck you moth, get out of my eye." He then said to me, "that moth was a kamikaze son of a bitch." To which I replied, " I could hear him yell

'FOR THE MOTH... erland!'

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πŸ‘€︎ u/YetiFromJersey
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2020
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514 Dad Jokes

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Josvys
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2019
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How do you get peak activity?

Climb a mountain!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jlionbad
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2020
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space suits are the pinnacle of haut couture

they're like 400++ miles up, which is the highest of high fashion.

mountain climbing gear is a distant second

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πŸ‘€︎ u/berninicaco3
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2019
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Got my grandpa with this one

I think I might go into mountain climbing...

It peaks my interest.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/peepthetoad4
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2017
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I finally cut ties with someone who was dragging me down

Mountain climbing with a friend is hard.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SuperMegaPepega
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2020
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I finally cut ties with someone who was dragging me down

Mountain climbing with a friend is hard

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nugeon
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2019
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I finally cut ties with someone who was dragging me down.

I learned that mountain climbing solo is a lot easier.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JustMy2Coppers
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2020
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I finally cut ties with someone who was dragging me down.

Mountain climbing with a friend is hard.

πŸ‘︎ 79
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kalzonkly
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2019
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